an experiment in gender acceptance

genderqueer: Andrew by Andrea Gibson

Thu, 03 May 2012 17:10:28 -0600

When I was a kid I would sometimes
Secretly call myself Andrew
Would tug at the crotch of my pants the way
Only pubescent boys do
Ran around pounding on my bare chest like tarzan
It’s not that I thought I’d grow up to be a man
I just never thought I’d grow up to be a…

Photo

Mon, 16 Apr 2012 21:10:11 -0600

Photo

Mon, 26 Mar 2012 19:29:25 -0600

The next step

Sun, 15 May 2011 17:30:01 -0600

I’m going to type this up because it makes it feel a little more legitimate… other than that it just feels like I’m having an unnecessary break up with tumblr. Haha this feels weird.

I think I’m going to move away from my use of this blog as a means of self examination. My goal was to better understand my gender, and to acknowledge with words what I’ve been feeling for 10 years but was unable to say. I’ve come to celebrate my femme side, and can recognize what components of my daily facade are my genuine masculinity and what components are bullshit mechanisms that try to conceal my feminine aspects. I know and accept that I’m not cis-gendered, am attracted to both men and women on some level, have begun to move away from sex-driven interactions with peers and am (for the first time ever, possibly) feeling the desire and confidence to have meaningful relationships with others. In words, I’ve accomplished the goal I set out to achieve and I think its time to approach this problem from a fresh perspective.

I love what the wonderful tumblr community has shared with me, and your words, images and links have created a forum through which I can get feedback from about my own personal dysphoria. I feel that the way I’ve transitioned into using this page is much more oriented towards some form of gratification (how many followers do I have? how many people have liked what I’ve written about?) rather than an evolving gender inquisition. I don’t think that sitting behind a computer screen anonymously blogging about manifestations about gender is the way to figure this out. Now that I’ve found some acceptance of myself, I think its time to get out and interact with people in real life.

This has been an important step on my path, but I’m ready for the next one. I think that moving away from my use of this blog is something necessary to get there. Cheers, and here’s to what will be.

i love this man

Sun, 15 May 2011 12:17:16 -0600

i love this man

Photo

Sun, 15 May 2011 11:45:56 -0600

delish.

Sun, 15 May 2011 11:45:30 -0600

delish.

I’m in love with headbands lately. I think Annika is super...

Sun, 15 May 2011 11:36:17 -0600

I’m in love with headbands lately. I think Annika is super cute when she wears them, and my partner let me borrow one of hers at the Cinco de Mayo party; they are fun/femme/fabulous!

want

Sun, 15 May 2011 11:31:35 -0600

want

Photo

Sun, 15 May 2011 00:31:49 -0600

this makes me happy

Sat, 14 May 2011 12:44:25 -0600

this makes me happy

icicleman: [Image; Photograph of a male-identified person in a...

Sat, 14 May 2011 12:42:59 -0600

icicleman:

[Image; Photograph of a male-identified person in a dressing room. He has black hair and glasses, but is holding a red digital camera over his face. He is wearing a blue, yellow, green, and white vertically striped dress with straps wrapped around the back of the neck. He is wearing white peep-toed heels and has a tattoo of a cod fish on his right foot.]

Because chainsawmascara has a thing for men in dresses.

Photo

Sat, 14 May 2011 12:34:21 -0600

Photo

Sat, 14 May 2011 12:32:15 -0600

beautiful!

Sat, 14 May 2011 12:25:49 -0600

beautiful!

I want some of these for my girlfriend’s next birthday...

Sat, 14 May 2011 12:01:12 -0600

I want some of these for my girlfriend’s next birthday present :-)

I bought these in blue last week and they are the single most...

Sat, 14 May 2011 12:00:31 -0600

I bought these in blue last week and they are the single most femme piece of clothing I’ve ever owned. I feel so scandalous when I’m wearing them!

Photo

Sat, 14 May 2011 11:41:32 -0600

cuuute alphapeacock: Me looking pretty =)

Sat, 14 May 2011 11:40:15 -0600

cuuute

alphapeacock:

Me looking pretty =)

this is the coolest thing I’ve seen all day!

Fri, 13 May 2011 21:21:01 -0600

this is the coolest thing I’ve seen all day!